


Damned Your Eyes

by linji



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Cussing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Smoking, slight domestic violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-30
Updated: 2015-09-30
Packaged: 2018-04-24 03:51:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4904503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/linji/pseuds/linji
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren always did this. Levi always forgave him. His eyes were always his reason.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Damned Your Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> This is my very first Ereri one shot. I am not good with grammar, I don't know where to put commas or periods. So if there is a problem with that, please let me know I will try to fix it. This was based off of the song "Damned Your Eyes" by Alex Clare. If you haven't heard it, I implore you to listen to it. I have a play list that I HAVE to listen to everyday, and some of the songs just give me Ereri feels. So please enjoy. Please leave comments. Much love.

He didn't know when it had gotten to this point, had never seen himself,in all of his 30 years,to be the one pacing back and forth in a 5th story 2 bedroom apartment talking to himself in the dark. The only glow other than the moon coming through the open balcony window, was that of the orange ember burning furiously at the end of his cigarette. The only sound was his low muttering and the crack and pop of the protesting tobacco. I have had enough, he said to himself over and over again. I can't take it. WON'T take it. This is the last time. I am in complete control and I won't take it this time.  
Time after time he had let him do this, and time after time he let him back in. He knew well enough that his apologies weren't genuine, as much as it looked and sounded like they were, they weren't. They couldn't be, he told himself, if they were he would stop.

It was always the same, after every ordeal they would have months of pure bliss. Just them being them, feeling safe and secure, enjoying each other. He knew those were always the happiest times and he always forgot anything wrong that happened because they were a normal happy couple;then it would happen. This wasn't something that was a surprise. But he was tired of pretending. Tired of the "I'm sorry baby"s and the "I can change"s. The look he always gave him at the end always made him forgive him. It was pathetic. He won't be forgiving him this time. Goddammit, not this time. He snuffed out his cigarette as soon as he heard the door close quietly and the living room light flipped on. He stood there with his arms across his chest and tried his best to school his face into one of indifference. 

"Fuck, Levi, you scared me" Eren said as he walked in and stood in front of him.

That smell, that fucking smell. Levi knew that smell,if he were 5 miles away he would know that smell. It was sweet and putrid and musty and Eren. Eren and someone else. Eren and that woman. He didn't like the fact Eren was staring down at him with that charming lop-sided smile of his. He hated the way it mocked him. He didn't have to ask, but he did anyway.

"Where the hell have you been Eren?" He was livid, his teeth ground together and his nails dug in the over-sized sweater Eren gave to him the first time he slept over.

"I was out....with Armin baby". Eren walked to the kitchen and grabbed a glass. He filled it with water and sighed after the liquid went down. He was lying, Levi could tell, not once did he look him in the eye and he saw the tint of red at the tip of his ear as he hurriedly went to the kitchen. 

"You're lying Eren," He was losing it "You're fucking lying and we both know it, it's 3 in the morning on a fucking Monday Eren, so tell me the fucking truth for once! Goddammit Eren! tell me!". It almost sounded like begging and maybe it was. He was hurt beyond belief, he was breaking and he couldn't take it anymore.

"I-I'm not lying baby" As it were, his ears lit up like a fucking Christmas tree. Levi never told Eren he knew of this, it was a weapon, it was his only hope, because if he looked into those eyes, those eyes that held galaxies in them, he wouldn't notice anything else and he would cave. He would believe anything this man spit out.

"You were with her Eren! I'm not a fucking fool! Now cut the shit and be straight with me!" Levi had crossed the distance from the living room to the island that Eren sat behind. His hands slammed down on the marble top, eyes burning and threatening to wash his red cheeks with all of his pain. Eren looked up and Levi looked away. Not his eyes, he chanted to himself, don't look into them.   
Eren got up from his spot and came around the island to stand in front of Levi. He never looked up. Couldn't look up. Trained his eyes on the floor beneath them.

"Yeah-" Eren started but he didn't need to finish. A loud smack as flesh connected with flesh resided through the apartment. That was the first time Levi struck him and he'd be a damn fool to let himself think that it didn't feel good.

"You good for nothing, selfish piece of shit" He looked up briefly to see Eren holding his jaw;shock written across his face. He immediately looked away when flash of green looked down at him "Get the fuck out".

Levi was seething, he was trembling with so much anger that he hated himself for it. He hated that he could do this to him. He felt Eren step closer to him and he stepped back, still looking at the wood under his feet. Eren stepped closer once again and gently, ever so gently latched onto Levi's sweater. It made Levi's skin crawl, but he couldn't pull away.

"Baby" He started and Levi knew, he knew that he couldn't look up "Baby, please" he begged "please look at me".

Levi shook his head, he shook his head so furiously that his black hair shook around his hidden face.

"Please Eren" his voice was breaking, his eyes were breaking as they leaked, he was breaking "Leave Eren, Please...just get the fuck out".

He had given Eren too much of him already. Two years, he's devoted himself entirely, stayed faithful, never lied. Eren had given him high hopes only to stomp on them every few months. And every time Levi gave him excuses to make himself feel better. To make himself believe Eren did in fact love him and that every time would be the last time. But this time, it was. He just had to stand his ground, project that hurt and that rage he held in all this time. Let Eren know, he can't keep doing this to him and this time was the very last time Eren would be able to hurt him. I can do this he chanted like it was a prayer, like it was the very last thing he had left inside of himself.

"Levi," It came out shaky, like he was shedding quiet tears "I'm sorry baby, I promise it'll change, I promise I can change." He clung onto Levi though not risking stepping further into his person. "I promise I will change".

"I-" he stuttered, shit, he's breaking "I don't believe you Eren, this is it. We-we're done".

A gasp and Eren's hands were no longer on Levi's sleeves. It burned holes through the wool straight onto his pale skin. He wanted to look up, to see his face because that was DEFINITELY not the reaction he thought he would have. He expected yelling and a whatever and that would be that. Eren would be off to her place where he always goes when his few months of bliss were up. 

"L-Levi please baby" crying, this man was crying. His tears don't mean shit, Levi told himself "I love you, I can change".

Eren was fast as he pulled Levi flush against his chest. He buried his head in his ebony hair and cried. Levi felt the shaking in his shoulders, the wetness in his hair, but that smell. That smell assaulted his senses and he suddenly felt dirty....violated...defiled.

"Get out" He shoved Eren away "You stink just like that filthy bitch! Get the fuck out!"

"Levi....Levi look at me"

"Get the fuck out Eren!" He couldn't cave, he couldn't look. 

And then he felt a pair of warm hands surround his face. Pulling it upward,

"One more time," he whispered "just one more time before I leave...please...look at me".

It was a mistake, his grey blue eyes that held the ocean looked into the turquoise green ones that held the universe. Levi's breath was taken away and his resolve crumbled. Tears still shamelessly pouring out of those eyes that captured every part of him. Big and round, it held every story of his life, of his entire being. His innocence, his deviousness, his pain, his determination and dare he say..his love? He wasn't certain. But what he was certain of was that he was back to square one, fallen completely under his spell once more. One doesn't simply look into Eren's eyes and look away. He stood there, hands around Eren's wrists and felt himself melt under the watery gaze.

"I love you Levi, I'll make it right, I promise..please just one more chance"

And Levi knew that he was fucked, he knew as long as the man standing before him looked at him the way he did he would always give him one more chance. Because Levi knew, he only ever looked at him that way. The woman he slept with was just that,a woman he slept with. He didn't love her. It was something he had to get out of his system. He only ever did it once every few months. She may have had him 3 times out of the year, but he had him 365 and that meant something, it had to. It would be OK to forgive him. They will work it out. He wasn't lying...his eyes told him so.

"I'll fix it baby, I promise...please stay". 

Eren was staring with the utmost determination glinting in those stunning irises. And yet they were soft and sad and absolutely gorgeous. And Levi, like every time, fell in love all over again. Damned those eyes, Levi thought as he leans in and clings to the back of Eren's shirt. Hugging him as if he wasn't subjected to gravity and trying to keep him anchored. He let the silent tears rest and he let himself enjoy being back in Eren's strong arms. I have to stay, he smiled to himself. Because he felt it, maybe this time will be different. Maybe he really will stop. He looked back into those bright eyes. Just Maybe....

"I know you will".


End file.
